Dependencies rule our lives

Dependencies quietly rule our lives and determine our subjective level of freedom. They channel our thinking into specific habitual patterns that conquer our beliefs and actions. Even if we are physically free, we are constantly manipulated by what happens around us and this determines who we become. This dependency kills us quietly to fit us into the surrounding doctrine. We become its by-product.

The longer we live, the more dependent on different things we become, which makes us incapable of change and blinds us into going in one direction. We experience then flexibility as burden. There are bills to pay, children to look after, work to be done, dog to be walked, events to be organized and more. We fall in the obligation trap—the biggest dependency of all. Here I'll look at some dependency types and give some examples how they enslave us.

Our workplace

We fear that if we don't do our job well, we may get fired and lose your income. The inability to buy indispensable goods makes us dependent on our job and our boss. Although we may not like our job, we can't take the decision to leave. We are dependent.

Things we do

We often can't abandon work that we did in the past, even if it was of bad quality, because we invested our emotions, time and energy in it. We become dependent on what we do.


All people around us—friends, relatives, parents, strangers— influence us more or less. Accepting what they say makes us dependent on their thoughts. Questioning everything we hear allows for a less biased mind. What we accept as truth has an impact on our belief system. We become dependent on the people we speak with.


Debt allows other people to command our lives. Lenders like banks enslave us and demand regular payments of interest rates. Once we can't go out of debt, they have fully conquered our life. Debt makes us highly dependent.


In order to live a normal life, we need certain resources—water, food, air, electricity, petrol and others. If we don't have them, we are ready to exchange more and more of what we have for less and less of what we don't have. Without water and food we may survive only a week. For them, we'll forget everything else we wanted. Food starts to fully determine and control our actions and thoughts. Without clean air, we get ill and dependent on medicines and doctors. If we can't find a better doctor, we then became dependent on the quality of service of the current one. Without electricity we can't have light, operate electronic devices or do simple things we've taken for granted. We also can't have access to knowledge in a different than print form—and that only during daylight. Traffic lights won't be working and car driving will be very dangerous. We constantly look for sources of renewable energy to minimize our dependence. We are dependent on the resources we use.

Everyday things

If we want to withdraw money from our bank account, we are dependent on a debit card that hasn't expired, electricity, the proper function of the machine, money availability, eventually support staff in case the terminal isn't working. If we go through a revolving door in a store, we are dependent on the current available space within it, how fast other people on our side push the door, people who may try to enter in the opposite direction without getting trapped, kids that don't want to burst their balloons or disabled people, who might need assistance. If we want to print an article online, we need electricity, a working computer, a working internet connection, a working printer and the ability to operate it properly or find an assistant, enough toner or ink with the needed colors, paper. If we buy a monthly bus card, it may be used only with a particular bus number. Each time we go out, we must think how to make the most effective use of it—we are dependent on the route of this bus line. These and similar things make us dependent too.

Addictive things

Addictive things like coffee, tea, Coca-Cola, cigarettes, chocolate, alcohol, drugs, gambling and others make us crave for more and ruin our health and lives. They fog our mind and make us more aggressive. Once we get dependent, we can hardly control our behavior.

Company acquisitions

Many small companies get acquired by bigger ones, but this doesn't guarantee them a better future. If the bigger company gets into trouble, the smaller one is automatically affected too. When General Motors was in trouble, its daughter company—Opel—was threatened by bankruptcy, which required the intervention of the German government. Many great companies that were acquired became dependent, unpopular or even bankrupt. Acquisitions introduce hierarchy, which is a form of dependency.

Mass media

We are constantly brainwashed by the mass media—TV, radio, Internet. We believe unconditionally in most of the things we hear or see—they are powerful manipulators of our thoughts. Mass media accelerated the delivery of bad news, which makes us feel sad, depressed and weak. Positive news are entirely omitted, because the results of a questionable study from the past have shown that people pay more attention to negative news. At the end we became victims of the negative mood spiral worldwide. Mass media tries to impress us with "trends" of what has happened in the past until now and what we can expect in the future. This has practically disabled our actions, because we started to feel negligible and unable to control our own future. We became dependent on all kinds of bad news, so the ones we hear today reinforce and confirm the ones that happened yesterday. We must prove to ourselves that the worse things still continue to happen. A clear dependency. Internet can be a huge time-waster, but it's also a valuable resource if we want to learn and grow. We must find the right balance in order to not make it a liability.


We need to become more aware of our dependencies and eventually find ways to eliminate them from our lives. Only through conscious decisions of what we let into our lives can we gain our control back. Please, don't become dependent on what you've read so far and think everything through your own, unique prism.